My siblings called me stringy just because I didn’t buy them things from my salary. Or maybe they’re talking behind my back about me not giving some money to my parents. Well actually, my reasons are quite reasonable. I mean, why would I spoil them with things that they wanted instead of needed? There’s a thin line between wanted and needed something. I prefer to give some to the need. As for my parents, they still could afford to buy things on their own. Their earnings are bigger than mine. So what’s the need of giving some money? I mean, there are other ways to show our gratitude as a child, sincerely like be there for them even when they don’t need us to. For me, it’s more meaningful than just a few cash or cakes.
I want to make it on my own. I want to stand on my own two feet and don’t depend on my parents. I want to be like them, financially. I had a better education than them, so I guess it is normal to expect myself exceeding them. It’s going to be a rocky road, but I have to prepare for it. I know I am weak because I never had to undergone a difficult situation before. But I’m making myself stuck in this challenging situation that I am in right now, just to make me a stronger person.
It is hard when every time we had a family dinner or lunch, my siblings are blabbering about things that I consider pricy. The things I can’t afford. I don’t deny that half of me want those things too, like cars or the latest cell phone. But the other half is just too ashamed to ask for financial support. Now that I have my own earnings, I have to ease their burden.
Being grateful for what I have is easier to say than done. Whenever that dissatisfaction and the urge of making more money come, I just have to look at the people around me. Yes, I have very successful friends, but simple things like saw an old man cycling his old bike or family of four had to squeezed in to a motor bike, makes me back to my common sense. Not everybody could have the opportunity to eat in a fancy restaurant like my family. Not everybody could have the privilege to ride a nice car with air-con like my dad’s. It’s true what they say that we won’t find satisfaction by comparing ourselves with the haves. There are skies above the sky. If only we could look around us more carefully, we will notice that there are tons of people out there just struggling to earn money to feed their stomach.
Does that mean that I am satisfied with my current state? Absolutely NOT. I’ll be a static human being if that happens. I’m not satisfied with myself financially. Like I said before, I have to exceed my parents. They’d expect me to. That’s why they put me in school. But by understanding how to be grateful, I carefully choose extra jobs, or what vacancy to apply. Just because I need bigger salary to maintain my house, that doesn’t mean that I took every chances that come to me. There are considerations. If I didn’t get called for a vacancy, it means that I still have things to finish in my current employer. I’m not giving up, not while I had time, skill and the resources.
Image: jackeyer.com
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